I have three boys, none of whom I had cut.
The first, over 35 years ago, set the scene – so precious the new life out of my body . . no way was anyone going to harm him. When he and his brothers all grazed their knees or were otherwise damaged for the first time – it was heart rendering that they were no longer in pristine/virgin state.
Why ever would I choose to have a hunk of skin removed . .when my body grew his to such perfection?
Maybe the meanderings of a mere mother.
What right did I have to mess with his sexuality – as surely that flap of skin meant, similarly to the hooded pleasure palace a woman carries – there for protection?
When I met up with his step-father, himself intact, he was horrified that we had not seen his penis at all and here the lad was three years old!!
So – eventually it popped out.
A lot of white gunk emerged also.
I thought nothing more about it.
Baby two emerged from my body, with a dad who knew what to do . .
When he was old enough to sit in the bath – dad taught him to do what his dad had.
Swizzle the water in the bath around the genitals and that was that .. . natural curiosity did the rest – and baby two had a perfectly functional set of baby-making equipment.
In the interim, son one was growing up and one day asked me to follow him into my clinic here he sat down, pulled his pants down (such courage – imagine this at 14 years old, men reading this) and asked me should his penis look like this?
No … . it was being strangled ..
So he eventually had a circumcision – I had wanted it to be a partial, but in the public system they did a full one – under general . .. and left a few stitches in . . . to poke him over the years . .
So there we are . ..the reason of telling this tale is a cautionary one.
If you have a cut man as a dad, as I did for son one – he may not know what to do.
Forewarned, son three arrived.
Around the same time son one was having his operation dramas (at 18 years old).
I was not going to have this happen to another son .
Mother on a mission.
I could not get the foreskin (gently, gently, to not be stuck onto the wee penis head. . . . so I got an appointment with the public urologist at the hospital as I did not want another son going through what number one had.
Specialist had a round of nearly doctors with him. Him looked at my son’s nappy less penis. Asked the question of all of the nearly doctors – what should it be like?
No one knew . ..
‘It is perfect mum – leave it alone and it will be fine’ – the medical man had spoken. Did he himself have a foreskin? Maybe I should have asked him.
Was I worried – still a little – as what did he know of my firstborn’s dramas?
What to do?
Somewhere strike the balance between what happened for the three sons mentioned.
Maybe son one would have been fine if we had been more vigilant for him before he was three years old.
Maybe he had a foreskin that was always destined to be tricky .. . .
Maybe the others would always have been OK without maternal messing .. .
Again – who would know?